…those are the controls that determine the kind of options we embrace in the face of the unfolding events of our lives. They are the reasons we act the way we do. We are motivated by the feelings of fear or misery (or discomfort).
While fear is the pull force that prevents us from attempting and accessing new frontiers of possibilities, misery is the push force that gets us to go outside our comfort zones in the pursuit of our preferred experiences. They are both internal variables that determine the possibility of the occurrence of critical changes in the life of an individual. Until your misery level exceeds your fear level you won’t change. Changes that breeds growth will often not come to us when we are comfortable because of the way we prize security. It is the way it is. If you can tolerate it, you won’t change it.
There’s a psychological experiment that was conducted, in which, a frog was put in a drum of cold water and the water was heated gradually with the temperature increasing slowly. The frog did nothing until the water went from being warm to boiling hot and it killed it. Same frog specie was dropped in boiling hot water and immediately, it leaped out because it sensed clear danger. It was a matter of life and death. The sharp discomfort was enough impetus to negotiate a quick escape. Its degree of misery was far high than the fear of failing from an attempt to leap out of the vessel.
And this is not too different for humans. Sometimes, we need one or two major shocks from life to propel us to make the much-required leap that we deserve. (even though that’s not a smart approach).
So, if you don’t like where you are now, move, you are not a tree!